ORDER! ORDER! HE made the internets stupid!

It’s been too long since I’ve updated this blog, internets, but I don’t really plan on apologizing for that today. Instead, I’m going to don the rant pants and do some serious bitching. Here’s the short version: Facebook is stupid, twitter isn’t worth squat, and Hulu is about to get one less user. Whew. Now onto the long version.

Facebook is still hard to use. They’ve added a new feature where you can have a live feed roll down the page in “real time,” except it’s not real time. As a fairly adept internet user, I’ve usually got a minimum of four tabs open, one for each service and then random site hopping. If you are on another tab, the facebook timeline doesn’t update. You have to actually go back and make sure the site is the focus before it will do anything. You can tell that the idea of the “live feed” came from the Friendfeed guys, but it looks and feels like the Facebook guys are the ones who implemented it. Granted, the Friendfeed guys ARE the Facebook guys now so I’ll rephrase: Good idea, shitty implementation.

They’ve also removed cities from networks. So I guess the only networks I *can* have are schools or jobs? I question the usefulness of networks now, especially now that friend lists are becoming a big deal. Also, what good are networks in a twitter-ized environment anyway?

I heard somewhere that Twitter was worth billions. I kind of wish *I* had thought of a service with poor uptime and a shitty API so I could be worth billions too. Oh yeah, they’re coming out with lists, a feature that every other service has had for some time now. Hell, even twitter clients have list-like features.

You’ll remember a blog post I made awhile back bitching about users who couldn’t be bothered to pay the small fees from Pandora. Yeah, those people are still tight asses, but there’s some news that might make this “pay for online content” debate a little bit more complicated. Hulu is expected to charge for their content by 2010. I think this is a fairly retarded decision, considering the fact that the service isn’t out of it’s infancy yet (my opinion). Also, for a service like hulu to start charging, it needs to change the way it’s delivering it’s content. First of all, to me, pay for online content means zero advertising. It also means the service (like the article says) needs to extend beyond the website and extend *reliably*. Also, this eight day delay between episode air date and hulu release would have to stop. In fact, I would say that Hulu should just release the episode as soon as it airs.

Now, there was mention that there could be a tiered pricing scheme, which would make this into a less-sucky idea. But I’m going to put it out there that there won’t be much to the free tier. Sorry, but at this point, I see no reason to move to Hulu from Cable, or to even pay for both. Cable sucks, but at least it’s reliable and it won’t buffer if your connection isn’t as stellar.

Ugh.

Naturally, I didn’t quit either of the services, choosing instead to adopt Johnny Worthington’s idea of “going down with the ship.” But things had definitely changed for me with the news. What was once a blossoming service with immense potential became a cancer patient with but a few months to live.

I don’t really want to spend any more time talking about this, because I still need more time to think. But I feel like I’m about to lose something big here, something that I put a lot of my life into.

1. I loathe lotions of any kind. I won’t even use sunscreen because of how horrible it feels on my hands.
2. I chew on the string of my hoodies.
3. I’m very jittery. Watch me try to keep still and see…
4. I lose my train of thought in the middle of stories.
5. I have some kind of insomnia. I say “some” because I manage to get sleep in there somewhere. Stayed up till 6am this morning, matter of fact. (edit: That was a day or so ago, by the way)
6. I get panic attacks. They last awhile sometimes.
7. I walk a lot.
8. I have two pet cats who have steadily become more and more important in my life. I carry conversations with them regularly.
9. I’m allergic to wood nuts (almonds, walnuts, pecans, cashews, anything like that that grows on trees). Many trips to the ER have proven this. And yes, it’s a fatal allergy.
10. I can eat the same thing day in and day out and not get sick of it, provided that I only have it once a day….if that makes sense.
11. I usually WILL go there. That’s right! You heard me.
12. Before I can get truly relaxed for bed, I need to rub my feet together a few times. It’s very soothing.
13. I have been hit by a taxi before, while crossing the street.
14. You wouldn’t like me when I’m angry…in a car…during rush hour.
15. I have fan art published in the Knuckles spin-off comic from Archie Comics.
16. I absolutely MUST MUST watch a TV show from episode 1 forward. If I watch it out of context, I don’t get into it.
17. I have crashed two vehicles, one a conversion van and the other a pickup truck. Both were my fault, but no one was hurt except me…
18. I fear even the smallest of heights. If I’m on a ladder, my knees shake and I get all sweaty in the palms.
19. Bloody noses tend to push my panic button in a very serious way.
20. I’m a writer because I’m not good with the talky talky.
21. I have a difficult time looking people in the eyes. A very difficult time.
22. I’m one of those people who becomes way friendlier when booze is involved.
23. My shoe size is 13.
24. I overthink things way too much.
25. Public mirrors. Cannot stand to see myself in them. I HATE HATE HATE them. I hate myself in them. I don’t think I can stress this enough.

Oh yeah, and we have a new president now. Fun times.